Day 1473


Ok- it seems like the only way for me to calm down is to get it out.

Bitsy ate the cat food again tonight when my back was turned. The very expensive cat food I had to burn my lunch break to go get because the cats would have been out of food tonight if I hadn’t. And, just as an aside, I am not sure how my budget is going to stretch to afford the cat food and frontline every month… so dog eating enough food for all four cats for a day in two minutes= me mad as hell. She knows she isn’t supposed to… so she sneaks in the kitchen if she thinks she might get away with it at all.

Holidays. They mean something to me. I respect it if they don’t mean anything to you- great. But could you respect me enough to allow that I’m not you and I might just have a different view point… and I might like having my view point? Yes, it means stress on me. But I’m not going to get out of the stress.

Let’s postulate that I adopt the view that the holidays mean nothing (which, by the way, is a really shitty thing for a mom to do). So I’m not giving gifts and I’m not getting gifts. Bit I still have to do Mom’s shopping, do Emily’s shopping, decorate Mom’s house for her and cook the dinner. Oh and bake a cake for Emily because that’s just a completely asshole move- don’t celebrate her birthday because it’s in December between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I’m sure she’ll understand…. not going to happen. Hum- it looks like by being an asshole I get out of buying a couple of gifts and sending cards to a few people who would really appreciate knowing I remember them once in awhile. I still have to do almost everything else because I’m not going to convince Emily and Mom that the holidays mean nothing.

About Thanksgiving. I will probably have to work. Then I will have to rush home and cook dinner- or let Mom spring for a $50 deli meal that will be barely edible and rush home to heat it all up and get it on the table. And Mom’s invited Blake and Lynn… so let’s feed them take out and frozen stuff for the holiday they get to spend with us every other year that’s based around dinner. Yeah, great plan. Asking them not to come- not an option. This is the only time they visit all year and everybody, including me, wants to see them.

So lots of stress- no getting out of any of it, really. And this is our busy time at work- plus the Floral manager has decided that now would be a good time to have sinus surgery so I have her job to do as well as both of my own. And since she is not there, I’m the one who gets to put up Christmas decorations for the store too.

I’d love to have time to do the holiday baking… and make decorated cookies… and Turkey Pilgrims out of oreos and candy corn. But everybody has dumped all their holiday chores on me so I don’t get to do any of the fun stuff… I have less than no time for anything more than the bare minimum.

On top of this, the neighbours- knowing that Mom’s staying in bed mostly- brought a bag full of greens for us. Guess who gets to wash, chop and cook them? Thanks for that- I needed more to do.

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